Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
