I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
