And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
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