Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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