All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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