btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I CAN MOONWALK!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
