we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
