Sponge bath it is.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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