they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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