Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
