she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
