can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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