brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
