I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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