Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize
