I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
