i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
