if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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