Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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