How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
