Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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