I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
