im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize