I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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