It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
