Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
