He is like the real live version of the state fair..
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
