If you die in college, do you die in real life?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
