U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
