Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
