My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
