Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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