do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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