My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
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