just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
