hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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