I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize