I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
