ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
