Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
