R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
