i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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