Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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