Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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