what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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