So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
