this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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