i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
