and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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