it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
